As I am writing this, I am 38 weeks pregnant. I cannot believe that I’ve hit this milestone in my pregnancy journey, and what a beautiful journey it has been. It far away from ending as the biggest moment is yet to arrive – the birth of our baby – but I can tell you know for sure this pregnancy will always be one of my proudest achievements as a women. Since I remember that I have always wanted to go through pregnancy and birth, it is something that truly brings me so much excitement and joy. I was never scared of anything about being pregnant, I was never scared of labour and giving birth and that still remains the same. If there is anything I feel about this all is love and excitement! I am just super excited to experience birth in the most positive way possible.
So before this baby decides to come to the world, I am sitting down to share with you my experience way from the start. Not only for you to hopefully feel inspired and believe that pregnancy is pure joy but also for me to be able to look back in a few years time. It is going to be a long one so grab a cuppa, sit back, relax and enjoy the read.
We started trying to get pregnant straight after the wedding, in late July 2018. By March 2019, still nothing had happened and that’s when I created my Instagram @Fertilitychats to share my journey – that is where all the Fertility Chats posts come from. I was loosing hope as I was always scared that I would not be able to have babies so I needed to be able to talk to other women going through the same. It was the best thing I did.
Anyway, after many attempts, after several negative pregnancy tests and many tears, our day finally arrived. It is funny to think how it all happened. It was August 2019 and we went home for our Summer holidays. I had no hope whatsoever that that would be the month so I really enjoyed our time back home. I was chilled, calm, relaxed and enjoyed every bit of sun and cocktails as I could. Of course with the alcohol I would always be very sensible just because I always had that little sprinkle of hope that maybe I would be pregnant. Looking back at our photos from those days in Madeira and to know that there was already a baby in my cute little flat belly makes me smile so much!
My cycles were always very long, sometimes 85 days long so I never thought of doing a test whilst I was there. But I was, of course, tracking my cycle so by the time we came back to the UK, I knew I had ovulated. On the 13th of August 2019, I took a test to find that I was pregnant and I just couldn’t believe it! Read the full story here.
The 1st Trimester
Oh, this was a rough one! I was so happy in the beginning as I really didn’t have any symptoms. But the truth is, they came and in full strength! I was bloated, felt constantly tired and the sickness was a whole other level. Basically, I was always falling asleep around 6pm, even when at my friend’s house – I couldn’t control myself. The sickness was mostly in the evenings and it was pretty bad.. there was times that I would get up during our meal, vomit and go back like nothing happened and carried on eating because I was honestly so hungry all the time as well! It was quite intense symptoms wise but I was happy to be feeling all of that because it meant, to me, that all was going well and baby was growing as it should.
We had our dating scan and seeing our baby for the first time was the most beautiful thing. I was so emotional because I honestly just couldn’t believe it. If I told you now that I did a pregnancy test on the day of the first scan would you believe me? Case I did do this.. I was so scared of getting there and not see anything on the screen that I just had to do another test! Unbelievable!
The 2nd Trimester
If the 1st trimester was intense when it comes to symptoms, the 2nd trimester for me was filled with all the feelings! Fear, happiness, love, anxiety, doubt, uncertainty.. everything you can imagine and much more. It was also when I started noticing a little bit of a bump around 16 weeks, felt the first kick at 19 weeks and found out we were having a boy at our 20 week scan!
These three months were the most intense ones of this whole pregnancy, as I said, mostly because of all the feelings. The first trimester was filled with joy and excitement! You’re in that baby bubble and you just can’t believe it is real. Then comes the second trimester and it hits you. It’s the fear of something going wrong, the fear of not being ready to be the good parents we always wanted to be.. And because it was when I started noticing changes in my body, I was also worried about loosing a little bit of my identity because I just kept thinking “Will I ever go back to the old me?”. I know, selfish but I can assure you almost every woman will have these thoughts. Now, I couldn’t care less. I just want my baby to be healthy and happy.
I also felt very tired during this trimester and the nausea/sickness stopped midway through. Then I was basically symptom free up until now!
The 3rd Trimester
I am taking the risk to say that the third trimester has been my favourite ones so far. Maybe because we got everything ready: the nursery, the hospital bag, we decided on a name and all that jazz.. it was the trimester where all the preparation for this baby happened. Yes we did some bits and bobs before but it was during these last three months that we dedicated our time to get our house ready for our baby boy.
I also felt great! No nausea, sickness or tiredness. I have been full of energy and motivated. I have actually started working out during this trimester and it feels amazing. I am lucky because my bump is very small so I guess that helps a lot. I had to have a couple of growth scans because my bump was measuring too small and that can be a bit stressful. I cried of worry , thinking my baby wasn’t growing as expected but I just carry very small and now I am thankful for that.
I suffered with a bit of pain around week 34 but that went away after a couple of weeks and apart from that, it was all pure joy. I think I have been having some Braxton Hicks since late week 37 but it’s nothing unbearable! Of course Coronavirus is happening and that has stopped me to be able to do a lot of things I was planning to do whilst on leave and before the baby’s arrival but we are well, we are healthy and that is all we could ask for.
Now we wait for this beautiful baby boy to decide to come to the world. There’s no rush, he will come whenever he’s ready. The good thing about being at home since 36 weeks is that I have honestly lost track of time and I am not focusing on dates as much as I thought I would. Everything is ready for our little prince. The nursery is done, we have our Next2Me cot, our hospital bag is more than ready and most important of all, we are ready to become his parents. We are ready for the challenge, for the 4th trimester and to learn how to be good parents.
At the moment, at 38 weeks, I feel at my best. I feel beautiful, I love my bump and I know I am going to miss all of his movements and I will miss this comfort of knowing that he is safe inside me. We are so looking forward to see his little face, hands, feet.. We haven’t done a 4D scan at all so we literally have no idea how he looks like so we are just very excited to meet him.
Baby’s due date is on the 15th of April, so now we wait!